Festive Pastimes of the Miraculous Alcoholics
The miraculous alcoholics spool whirlpools
And spin them on their hips like hulahoops,
Whereupon they appear to be drowning.
Slack as kraken, they’re the type rumored to mutiny,
Hands daft as masts, blasted captains, dabbling damned Ahabs.
Their every revolution circumscribes Bermuda Triangles,
To hear them tell it, as they recline, dangling legs
Over ship railings like the skinniest of fishing poles.
Sinfully drinking flips and swinging eggnogs,
A coastguard of poltroons, mugs foaming with rumfustian,
Albatross tossed into the sea, unsold on omens,
Spies to the last man, rebelliously seeing right through
The veritable spyglass of piracy.
